OK most of you know I am usually happy and pretty easygoing, but I feel like there are just no breaks in life for me right now. This whole year so far has been so horribly difficult and I would just like some perspective on keeping a good outlook and staying grateful.
To start with I broke my leg in March while trying to get license plates of the car dh blew the engine in… just after I found out I was pregnant. Unfortunately it was my right leg so I couldn’t drive for 8 weeks…UGH, I am way too independent for that!!! Then my 17 yo ds had to have ankle surgery and 2 of us were down… I couldn’t even drive him to school and dh leaves for work at 5:15 am so ds had to ask friends for rides. I had to get rides to work too… with a co-worker I don’t much care for. Then on May 1, I finally had insurance coverage… and I woke up to bleeding and had to go to the hospital where I miscarried. About this time my oldest(20 yo ds) blew the engine in my car that he had been driving… OK, but he left it in a parking lot of an apartment complex and it got towed. Down 2 cars and 2 legs so far… next, the 17 yo dives out of a paddleboat into a lake…into 3 feet of water! Another trip to hospital!!! but on the good side, 2 days before I was allowed to start driving. So now he has a concussion and cervical strain…what more you ask… well remember the car that got towed??? We get a bill from the towing company for $1164.17 for towing and storage because ds never changed the car over to his name! Now all the medical bills are coming in for all the stuff I have to pay for and dd’s school sends me a bill for the rest of her tuition…$1125 left on it. Miscarriage bills to date:$9500, broken leg… work covered… DS’s surgery and concussion…don’t know yet!! AND to top all this off, my dog actually broke his stranded cable and got loose, got picked up my the dog catcher… friend in police dept waived the fine but dog got sick and has been in the vet hospital for a week… they estimate the bill to be about $400 so far. When is this all going to end??? Not yet apparently!!! We get the bill for dd’s tuition for next year and of course it went up…like over $1000. Her tuition is now $6300/yr and the cherry on the cake…ds needs to be homeschooled next year and that is about $500.
So, my usual cheery self is not cheery… my prospects for a raise at work seems to be contingent on someone else’s performance and he is not getting it done… and I am so depressed and just feeling totally worthless, like I am a huge burden on dh, along with my kids… I work so hard, I try to keep positive, but I feel like I am finally beat… I just feel like screaming I GIVE UP!!!
PLEASE… I could use words of encouragement right now, and maybe some prayers please…