When should I start looking for a relationship?


#1

Hi,

I’m an 18 year old first year nursing student at a Christian university, and I’m starting to think about relationships and when the proper time to look for one is. I grew up thinking that I should wait until I’m graduated to find a good man, then wait a few years to become an independent woman, etc. but now I’m starting to think that I could be throwing away the possibilities of good relationships by doing this and wasting the time I have to raise a family.

Should I wait until I’m graduated to find a good man, or simply until I meet a man worth investing time in a relationship with, even if I’m an undergrad? And if so, what might the hallmarks of a potential spouse be? I’ve never been in a relationship or looked for one before, so I have no experience in this area.

By the way, I’ve already thought about the religious life for many years, and I do not think that I am called to it (though perhaps this will change as I get older; who knows?)

Thanks!

Emily


#2

It’s generally easier to find a good relationship while at the university than it is outside, in my opinion. Well, there are more people there to pick from.

Hallmarks of a potential spouse…honesty, reliability, trustworthy, seriousness, integrity, respectfulness. If you can find someone who is of your same faith, generally easier relationship.

Generally, I think it’s good for a potential spouse to have a good job or be on his way to having one.

Personally, I think it’s helpful to have someone of a similar educational level, things in common.

I think you could start with friendships. Allow the friendships to take some time before thinking of anything more serious, and allow a relationship, once it happens, to likewise, take time before marriage.


#3

College.

High school is great for learning about the dynamics of relationships, but college is when you should really be looking. Where else are you going to find a whole bunch of your peers of the opposite sex?:shrug:

Also, try not to worry so much about timing as far as relationships, starting a family, etc. Trust that God has that one figured out for you.


closed #4

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