It is not an automatic thing. Suffering can either embitter us, or it CAN be a means of our drawing closer to him. He understands suffering. If anyone deserved to live a suffering-free life it was him. If he suffered so terribly despite who he was and the good the did, then who am I to expect better treatment?
Here’s the thing. If we have any reasonable hope of heaven, that should put things in perspective. If heaven someday is a definite hope of mine, then I have a certainty that someday, all the bad in my life will disappear and all the good will become stronger and last forever. That thought helps me hang in there. Jesus’ death on the cross was redemptive. The cross in and of itself was horrific, humiliating, possibly the greatest act of suffering and evil ever committed. But God redeemed that suffering and through it flung open the doors of heaven for all who will believe and follow. So too with us, he can redeem our suffering and bring forth real good out of it. But it doesn’t make the suffering fun or easy. And it doesn’t mean I don’t try to avoid it. I do.
In order to access his redemptive power in my suffering, I ask him to come into my suffering and accompany me through it. It’s a comfort to me that he understands how hard it is.