Where do I go when there's nobody?

I don’t know what to do. I’m struggling with lots of issues right now and it’s just painful and seems absolutely pointless to pray. I was just diagnosed with clinical depression and I don’t know why or how all this is happening at once.

I don’t have access to a regular priest here on campus, and I really don’t fit in well with the Catholic fellowship group here. I don’t really know where to go or who to turn to. I don’t want to go through counseling with just a secular approach. I feel so trapped right now. I don’t even feel like I can turn to God for anything, I’m just alone it seems.

Can anyone offer advice? Praying in a state like this is really hard. Almost impossible…

Do you have parents, siblings or close family you can turn to?

Looking at a Crucifix or praying the Hail Holy Queen can be good when you need solace.

Maybe watching a movie, a Catholic one perhaps, could help you relax.

If you have been diagnosed with clinical depression, finding a Catholic therapist (if you feel that a secular therapist near you is incompatible with Catholic teaching) could be an option. I don’t really know too much about them but here’s a website with Catholic therapists: saintmichael.net/

**Hail, holy Queen, Mother of Mercy!
Our life, our sweetness, and our hope!
To thee do we cry, poor banished
children of Eve, to thee do we send
up our sighs, mourning and weeping
in this valley, of tears.
Turn, then, most gracious advocate,
thine eyes of mercy toward us; and
after this our exile show unto us the
blessed fruit of thy womb Jesus;
O clement, O loving, O sweet virgin Mary.

        Pray for us, O holy Mother of God

        That we may be made worthy of the 
        promises of Christ.**

I’m really good with helping people deal with their depression, and I have a unique way of getting it not only under control, eventually you will reach the stage of bouncing back by default.

Understand, the depressive state produces a change within the brains chemical structure, this is why you are traditionally given medication to alleviate it. This works, but you end up becoming dependent along the medication, this is because there is no psycological foundation in place.

Think about this, all emotion creates in the brain it’s own chemical signature, in a depressive state, too often it dominates that system, overwhelming it to the point your thoughts themselves are derived from it, these in turn reinforce that same chemical structure to come about, which completes the vicious circle. The most powerful emotion you can harness is anger, it’s powerful due to how well it overwhelms the chemical structure. The trick to it though is to aim it in a constructive manner. So, an example of an angry thought, “I can do a great deal in this life”, or, “I mean something, I have worth”, with a self affirming manner, because I know full and well you very much can do a great deal in life, that you mean something, that you have worth entirely because you are a human being makes sense logically as well.

Just take the emotion and let it override that depressed chemical state, you have then just asserted authority over how you feel and are on your way forward. It’s much, much easier to dig yourself outside of that hole at this point entirely because you have just stood up for yourself. If you backslide, instead of feeling apathy, feel authority and being angry that you even remotely let yourself fall back against yourself because you know very well, you and your life is worth so much more then this.

Similar techniques have been done moving into laugh therapy, and that too should be worth looking into, just saying, my system works in cases where all else fail, it’s harsh for the unlearned, but only one that has been in the center of that dark pit and pulled himself out knows what it’s like, so to those that are finally relenting and need help on the quick, this is very effective.

LOL, laughter therapy is fun(ny): :rotfl:

metacafe.com/watch/1219392/laughter_therapy/

metacafe.com/watch/1219873/laughter_therapy_part_2_laughing_like_a_hen/

metacafe.com/watch/1628419/skype_laughter_chain/

metacafe.com/watch/2299997/laughter_yoga/

Here’s some more.:rotfl:

youtube.com/watch?v=aR75L08SBHo (my favorite)

youtube.com/watch?v=hZAr9E8i3ng

youtube.com/watch?v=PgW5M08GQ8c

youtube.com/watch?v=ivgJbtvrQ28

youtube.com/watch?v=lAT27LhkQ-4

youtube.com/watch?v=oh87njiWTmw

youtube.com/watch?v=8Q45N-oNu-4

youtube.com/watch?v=bfZ_gXCHaMw

I can understand not wanting to take a purely secular approach, but if I were you, I would wire the counseling services and ask if there are any counselors who, how would you say it…utilize a faith based approach.

I have PTSD and when I got to my college I, by tremendous grace, went to the wellness center and crossed paths with a therapist who is a committed Christian and he has just been my angel. I often wonder if it was Gods intention all along for us to meet.

Getting help from someone who shares my faith has been helpful beyond words. The last person I saw was a bit of a hippie feminist (not that I’ve got anything against such people, it just gets a little irritating when you’re interacting with them on such a personal level). She would tell me that I was important and that I mattered, and when I asked her why, she simply shrugged and said “Because you’re human.”

Whatever that means.

With the man I’m working with now, he to told me that I mattered, that I was important and worthy of love, and when I asked him why, he told me “Because you’re a child of God and Christ died for you to.”

Somehow , even from my objective mindframe, the latter answer made a lot more sense.

Also, watching videos online that make you laugh is like a miracle cure, at least it was for me. It literally kept me alive until I was able to come here and get proffesional help again.

From my own experience, in addition to continuing to pray, I would advise you to look for a 12 step program that deals with one of your biggest issues. These programs are an offshoot of AA and have a very spiritual foundation, are usually very supportive and effective, giving one the support and companionship one needs. If you do go searching and think initially these are not for you, keep looking for one that fits your particular needs. All 12 Steps don’t address the same issues nor have the same personalities attending. So find a program that fits YOU. :thumbsup:

Just to clear up some false impressions about secular therapists (and add a little fuel to the fire);), I experienced a clinical depression a number of years ago, and went to a very good secular therapist and a secular psychiatrist. Neither one of them did anything to destroy or make me question my faith. They did what good therapists do–accepted my beliefs as part of who I am, and worked from there. Never was there an attempt to change my religious beliefs or impose any of their beliefs on me. I didn’t even know the religious beliefs of them, except the psychiatrist was Jewish, but I don’t even know if he practiced his faith.My spirituality was my spirituality, and if anything, I was encouraged to develop it.

There are good therapists, and there are bad therapists. There are good Catholic therapists, and there are bad Catholic therapists. Being Catholic does not necessarily mean one is a good Catholic, always following the teaching of the Church. I was given medication by the psychiatrist to bring me out of the inertia of the depression so that I could benefit from therapy (because I could barely function on a physical level, let alone cooperate with therapy), went to therapy, and YES, was weaned off the medication when I no longer needed it. I was given a lot of autonomy both concerning my medication and therapy. Therapy is a lot about you talking, and them listening . You are the one healing yourself, with the help of the therapist (and of course, God). Find a good therapist you are comfortable with, and continue to stay close to God. I believe God put these people in my life to help me, and they certainly did.

"She would tell me that I was important and that I mattered, and when I asked her why, she simply shrugged and said “Because you’re human.”

Whatever that means.

With the man I’m working with now, he to told me that I mattered, that I was important and worthy of love, and when I asked him why, he told me “Because you’re a child of God and Christ died for you to.”

I see how the second answer sounds more loving, but aren’t they really the same thing? Didn’t Christ die for everybody?

I know how taxing depression can be, and whatever gets someone out of it, I support.

scapularkid8: You said you don’t have access to a priest on campus…what about off campus at the closest catholic church? Your campus should have some resources for students dealing with depression as well. If you are having suicidal thoughts, please call someone right away!!!

I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. When I was first diagnosed, I insisted on behavioral therapy as well as any regimen of medication. Therapy works wonders! whether the therapist is catholic or not, if he/she can get you talking about what is bothering you and help you see a different approach to thinking about things (my biggest problem was guilt because I’m a working mom). My therapist had a way of making me laugh about things that was very curative. Of course I cried a lot too, but at the time, my child was 2, my father had died right before she was conceived, I had miscarried a child, changed jobs, all of which served to really snowball into physical problems with no physical ailment.

Clinical depression is not easy to deal with, I will pray for you. Oh, and I have found that when I feel stressed if I go sit in a quiet place (a church when possible), and close my eyes, and put all problems aside, it is very helpful!!!.

I also find the Memorare to be very helpful!!!

But, what do you do when you have no family or friends? Nothing anymore? No money, no where to go, no one that needs you or loves you anymore. Help me, please, someone. Where can I go when you very little faith anymore? I’ve gotten to a point that praying is not helping at all. It’s making me crazy not having anyone. I know suicide is wrong, but the only thing that keeps me going today is that I have to find a good home for my dog. Please don’t laugh, I’m very fragile right now.

In that case reaching out to an, officially speaking, non-denominational health proffesional is your only option. I don’t mean to trivialize the way you feel, but I’ve been there. I was in a place in my head where people were in fact there for me, I had other human beings as resources, it just didn’t make a difference. I know what it’s like to feel trapped. You say you’re a college student? Go to the counsoling services, I don’t know how much more plainly I can put it. I had a bad experience with a therapist right before I came to school that made me very angry, so much so that I swore I would never get involved in therapy of any sort again. But when I realized I need help from someone, had no insurance and no one who understood my history, I went anyway, feeling very skeptical inside. It turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made, and the man I’m working with now is hands down the best counselor and friend I’ve ever had. If your situation is as desperate as you feel, which I believe that it is, you can’t waste time trifiling with what religion the people who help you practice, you need to take action on your behalf.

You are an Image of God and nothing should ever make you think less of yourself that suicide becomes an option. Do not forget that. I hope that you seek the counseling of a medical professional and/or a priest. Life was not meant to be easy and holding on to hope is sometimes all we can do.

There’s always a new horizon, a resurrection.

http://media.radiosai.org/Journals/Vol_04/01APR06/images/Coverstory/the%20story%20of%20easter/Jesus-Resurrection-01.jpg

Human life is a journey. Towards what destination? How do we find the way? Life is like a voyage on the sea of history, often dark and stormy, a voyage in which we watch for the stars that indicate the route. The true stars of our life are the people who have lived good lives. They are lights of hope.

[RIGHT]Pope Benedict XVI, Spe Salvi[/RIGHT]

PLEASE PLEASE Check out the 12 Step Programs I have suggested. I went for several years and the folks there helped me get my feet back on the ground.

Many, many of these folks had gotten as low as they could get, but with love, understanding and companionship they got back up to continue their lives, but lives with hope.

My husband had 100% sucess with a 100% secular depression treatment program. It turned out that a few members of the “team” were practicing Catholics, just not Catholic therapists. Pray anyway, even if you don’t feel like it.

:thumbsup:

well it looks like youve come to the right place. your not alone like you thought you were. there are people who care. that is proof alone that God exist. maybe God has put them in your path to help you along a little. Because sometimes it is a bunch of little things that get us through our sad times and just not just one big answer.

What want do you mean you have been diagnosed with depression? Is this by a doctor or by a chruch counsoler? if you havent i sugguest you do because depression can be cured with meds and such:thumbsup:

Hi scapularkid8,

Gosh, it sucks major to have clinical depression! Life does seem to suck a lot of times, doesn’t it? I’m still there unfortunately. Do you have supportive friends you can turn to? How about the saints…in particular St. Dymphna, she’s great! Another way is calling your local 24/7 crisis line.

Our love for ourselves may be shaky, but God doesn’t love us any less because we have depression. Don’t feel like you don’t love God because of not feeling like praying. God knows our hearts/intentions. Love isn’t only a feeling. I’m sure God is pleased with you reaching out for help. I’ll pray for you.

Hi babz,

How about a support group such as DBSA (Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance)? Or there’s even a site online: www.dailystrength.org. It’s an online support community. There are people who love you and care. I know it’s hard because it doesn’t feel that way. You may just never know how many people pray for you every day, raising awareness, etc. The saints in heaven are always supporting us. I’ll pray for you as well.

St. Dymphna, please pray for us that we would truly understand how much we’re worth to God and to others.

Not really. I only have a few close friends here at my new university (I transferred here this year) but I don’t know them well enough to share this with them. My other really close friends are far away and don’t really get what I’m going through. They just say “I’m sorry” and that’s basically all they can offer because they’ve never experienced it.

I have written before and suggested you find a 12 Step Program that deals first of all, with one of your main issues. Depression, loneliness? In the end scapular, we have to heal ourselves. All the therapy in the world, all the friends, relatives etc. will not do you any good. Healing must come from within. That is why I suggest a 12 Step program. These programs will help you identify your problems, what is holding you back and give you a path only you can follow. One of their mottos when attending a meeting is “Take and use what you can and leave the rest”. God bless.

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