Which Curmudgeon Coffee Is Better?


#1613

The day IS over,it’s 5:21pm Monday…c’mon slow coach !
I have coffee brewing,I cleaned out the baby chick pen,raked the horse paddock and emptied the vacuum cleaner :smiley:
I’m adding spearmint from the garden to the above this time,and dregs from the local pub so it should be a good 'un.:partying_face:


#1614

Monday is just starting here, 3:30 a.m. :full_moon_with_face::sun_with_face:


#1615

You look grey about the gills @christofirst :face_with_monocle:


#1616

Just good 'Ole Columbian brown, BUT with 3% condensed milk. (Weird thing is Starbucks doesn’t sell Columbian). Trust me, tastes just like cream w/o the cream, 3 cups a day for past 50 years. (My blood work is normal).

When we were on winter maneuvers in Denmark in the 3rd Div in 65, I went up the stairs of the cantine truck and asked for a coffee. He gave it to me black so I asked for milk. “Got none soldier”. Pointing to a can I ask “can I have some of that condensed milk in it?” And the love affair lasted.


#1617

Coffee A is disqualified – “Fresh roasted” indeed!

I am kind of split between Coffees B and C.

My doctor told me to cut back on metals, so Coffee D is out.

Next time there’s a bakeoff, I might submit this old family recipe:

  • Dollar Store Instant Coffee (How do they make it so cheap?)
  • Half-and-Half that’s gone sour because Fred at the office secretly sips it from the carton
  • Sweetened with Robitussin DM cough medicine, “EXP 05/2003”
  • Lipstick-stained paper cup from Starbucks dumpster

#1618

Instant coffee is made from ant hills… :neutral_face:

Notice the same consistency…


#1619

Shhh. That was a Nescafe trade secret. Now, everyone knows.


#1620

Truth in labeling though: On the label right up front it says Inst-Ant.


#1621

In my new ambition to watch more TV I saw an ad featuring shrimp being elegantly plated covered with an unidentified, still sizzling sauce. While every one already knew that Curmudgeon Coffee has been used in food photography, ie: coating a raw turkey with curmudgeon coffee to make it look roasted, or pouring curmudgeon coffee over a stack of pancakes instead of syrup because it doesn’t soak in, I’ve never seen curmudgeon coffee used to make a food product look like it was still on fire.

And speaking of fire and my new quest to watch more TV, I found two channels that feature nothing but a burning log. One’s called ‘Yule Log’ and the other one’s called ‘Classic Yule Log’. It never changes, it’s the same log, night after night, burning.

:older_man::tumbler_glass::smoking:


#1622

The Curmudgeon coffee brewed from fire ant droppings will make a food product look like it on fire.

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Here’s a simple omelet with Curmudgeon coffee added.


#1623

Our coffee is fire cured…


#1624

I’ve never had condensed milk in my coffee, but I remember seeing it in a movie once – “A Tree Grows In Brooklyn.” I remember being intrigued. :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

Loved the movie, but still haven’t tried condensed milk in my coffee. :coffee::milk_glass:


#1625

You’re a good fit for this nut house. :older_woman::smoking:


#1626

Doctoring mudgie coffee with things like milk and sweeteners is a sin.
Those things work for that weak stuff at Starbuck’s , but whoever has heard of a sweet curmudgeon?


#1627

I’ve been known to pass up a coffee shop to head home for my own special brew. :+1: Trouble is, the pastries in our American shops are awesome, but not as good has real Danish pastry in Copenhagen,…real cream!!


#1628

In the interest of Public Health and Safety the Curmudgeon Coffee Cafe’ (CCC) will be closed until further notice.
Top Scientists have found toxic levels of Baby Powder in the coffee. It was likely being used as a Creamer Substitute. :man_health_worker:


#1629

No problem. There was another thread showing Johnson Baby Powder was laced with asbestos. As such, it’s perfect for Curmudgeon coffee.


#1630

Back in the mid '80s we were working in an occupied office building, and the iron beams above the ceiling tiles had been sprayed with asbestos monokote fireproofing. We were given big respirators to wear, but told by the building management not to mention asbestos to the office workers. When the office workers (who weren’t stupid) asked us, “Are you wearing those masks because of asbestos?” we would nod our heads yes and say, “We can’t tell you.” :angry: Those were the “good old days” :roll_eyes: before safety regulations became more stringent.


#1631

A unique way of controlling heartburn.


#1632

Indeed it is. One of the factors making it perfect for Curmudgeon coffee.


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