Why are catholics so controlling?

I don’t have a problem with the tenets of faith, but catholics themselves, from priests to people that I know, they are so controlling. Even on this forum, you can feel the oppression of catholics imposing their edited version of the truth.

Generally speaking, why are catholics so controlling. They don’t criticise their own church for its wrong doings, to keep the peace, but at what cost? Morality is the cost.

How can Catholics or anyone for that matter, control other people? People can express their opinion on what is the right thing to do in a given situation and attempt to influence or persuade them, but unless they are using physical force or use their power to punish and/or intimidate others, they can’t control what other people do. Obviously, no one on an anonymous website is able to put a gun to anyone else’s head. I don’t know too many Catholics who do this in real life either.

Oh but we do! In any catholic gathering there is consternation and some criticism of “what is going on.” The other side of this is however, that we understand that we are all sinners, really, deep down we do. So it is easier to forgive some of the stuff going on. Forgiving however, does not mean not cleaning up! The other thing that restrains criticism is an abhorrence of gossip. We do admonish, but mostly in private, and even then, with charity.

Well we try anyway. The door to the reconciliation room is always open and used!

Gee…I don’t think I’m “controlling”. I’m really a nice guy.:confused:

I don’t criticize my Church…because it really can do no wrong.

And I’m not quite clear on what you mean by the “edited version of the truth”. Whatever that is…I wouldn’t impose it on anyone.

Because we are sinners. :smiley:

Catholics, Baptists, Buddhists, Muslims…the list goes on…none of us are perfect. All of us are going to say things that aren’t nice, that come across as rude or judgmental. Perhaps some Catholics take their “head knowledge,” and forget to apply it practically. So while it is true that there is no flexibility on church teachings, perhaps we could deliver the message a little more charitably.

Perhaps though, there is some truth to what the Catholic is saying and the listener (being a sinner him or herself) perceives it as being controlling or judgmental themselves because of their own relation to the issue at hand.

When you say “even on this forum,” you must realize this is, after all, a Catholic Forum with the majority of members being of the Catholic faith. If you go onto a Jewish Forum or a Protestant Forum, I’m sure you might observe the same thing pertaining to those of other religions. In my own personal experience, having several Catholic friends, I have not observed them to be controlling at all. Your experience apparently is different.

I don’t really see Catholics as more controlling than anyone else. Any Catholic who, as you say, “imposes” their editing of the truth is in error, if that is what they are doing, but IS that what they are doing, or are they just sharing their interpretations. Overall I find the CAF community to be inspirational and informative.

As far as wrongdoings, are you thinking of something specific? I think we have all heard the “keeping of peace” argument before. We are asked to be respectful of others, no matter where they are in their spiritual journey. People are guided by their views and experiences when discussing issues here. There is sometimes disagreement, and that is ok as long as that disagreement is charitable in form. What if someone were to disagree with your opinion, characterizing that view as a risk to morality in harsh terms? We can make our points and not be rude or hurtful about it. To be otherwise is the very definition of controlling that you speak of. This a religious forum.

To be Catholic IMHO is an outward sign of an inward endeavour. My world views have slowly evolved over time here and in the Church. I would like to think that they have evolved in the right direction. God knows of our intentions, he is the final judge. We all come here to learn, to help, to cry, to pray, and to ask for prayer.

I hope this gives you food for thought, and that you find this helpful.

I’m not a controlling Catholic. I just want things my way, that’s all.:stuck_out_tongue: Perhap’s you calling Catholics controlling is because of the pro life and pro traditional marriage positions we have. Sure there are Catholics on this forum with varied opinions which can be taken as controlling. I fail to see why not criticizing the Church would be seen as controlling.

This website is a lot more tolerant of people of other beliefs than a lot of non-Catholic websites are tolerant of Catholics.

We can just as easily say that people are controlling who want us to accept abortion and so-called same-sex “marriage” as rights.

Would you be more specific? In what way are Catholics controlling?

Annie

Quite right. In fact, I will say that I often think CAF is too tolerant as it has been my experience on other fora (secular - religious and political) that such tolerance is not reciprocated.

Agreed.

I actually hear what you are saying. As someone who has grown up in Catholic schools and even went to a Catholic university, I do believe that many Catholics tend to be very narrow-minded, black and white thinkers and a little on the judgmental side. I’m not saying that judgment is bad, but I do think that judgment without wisdom is destructive. And many people in our culture use judgement without taking things in the bigger perspective.

As a creative, open-minded and moderate-leaning person, I find that I tend to be drawn to non-Catholics. Many Catholics tend to think that being open-minded is a sin, and the road to hell, but honestly some of the most devoted, spiritual people I know are artists.

But I think what is more to the point is that while people may be one religion or another, we are all a product of our culture. The American culture permeates us all whether we are agnostic, atheist, protestant, muslim etc. At the end of the day, a lot of the richness, spirituality and mysticism of the Catholic faith is left behind in America due to the American obsession with utilitarianism, materialism, achievement and extroversion. As a result, the Catholic faith is skewed with Catholics that tend to emphasize those elements of the Catholic faith, for better or for worse. And don’t get me wrong, there are many good things to come out of the American Catholic faith community, but I do think that there’s also a lot missing.

In other words, if you are someone that is really more of a Catholic that is drawn in by the mystical, contemplative and meditative elements of the church, then you will probably feel uncomfortable in most Catholic faith communities in America, and possibly most faith communities in America in general.

Personally, I don’t have many Catholic friends. I try to surround myself with other types of people, but my faith is my faith and I believe in it, despite the fact that in America, Catholicism in many respects is just a sub-culture of Americanism.

Wow. I don’t think I’m at all black and white, or narrow minded. I love everyone! :slight_smile: Most Catholics I know are much more loving and open minded to people. However, being open minded or loving doesn’t mean disobeying God, the Church. Sure, God and the Church are very ‘narrow minded’ (your words) about abortion, same sex marriage, divorce, fornication, masturbation, murder…I don’t make the rules. I just follow them; I fail and I try again. God is right. The Church is right. That doesn’t make them narrow minded.

As a creative, open-minded and moderate-leaning person, I find that I tend to be drawn to non-Catholics. Many Catholics tend to think that being open-minded is a sin, and the road to hell, but honestly some of the most devoted, spiritual people I know are artists.

Being open minded is not a sin. However, I can accept that there IS sin, but I don’t have to accept the sin. I can love my family members who sin (as I know they love me). I know of many artists, scientists, creative people who are Catholic. I like to think I’m on the path to being very spiritual, and many people that I know are spiritual. I do know many non-Catholics who are very spiritual as well.

But I think what is more to the point is that while people may be one religion or another, we are all a product of our culture. The American culture permeates us all whether we are agnostic, atheist, protestant, muslim etc. At the end of the day, a lot of the richness, spirituality and mysticism of the Catholic faith is left behind in America due to the American obsession with utilitarianism, materialism, achievement and extroversion. As a result, the Catholic faith is skewed with Catholics that tend to emphasize those elements of the Catholic faith, for better or for worse. And don’t get me wrong, there are many good things to come out of the American Catholic faith community, but I do think that there’s also a lot missing.

We choose to be a product of our culture, if we are. Please please please don’t generalize about Catholics OR Americans in such broad sweeping strokes. Don’t single Catholics out, for we are just as human as any other person in the US.

In other words, if you are someone that is really more of a Catholic that is drawn in by the mystical, contemplative and meditative elements of the church, then you will probably feel uncomfortable in most Catholic faith communities in America, and possibly most faith communities in America in general.

Personally, I don’t have many Catholic friends. I try to surround myself with other types of people, but my faith is my faith and I believe in it, despite the fact that in America, Catholicism in many respects is just a sub-culture of Americanism.

You don’t have many Catholic friends, so perhaps you aren’t getting a true picture of Catholics. I do not feel uncomfortable in Catholic faith communities because I’m ‘spiritual’, but perhaps, in some, not the same level of spirituality as others have already arrived at, and I hope to attain. It’s not that they are lacking; it’s because I’m still learning and am the one lacking.

If you score an audition, ask that the CD sing -with accompaniment- and you will repeat a part by ear…either vocal or instrumental. (Ask how I know, LOL. ;).

I don’t think this is a function of being Catholic. It’s a function of being human. Ever been on an Evangelical forum? Same thing happens.

Controlling???:shrug: I don’t feel controlled by the Church. Oh, wait a minute!!!..:hypno: Yes Master!

Come to think about it…

Catholics NEED to be controlling because the others are so dense and need our help to reach salvation. :slight_smile:

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