Why do I keep torturing myself?

Like a dog returning to it’s vomit, I keep looking at anti-Catholic websites. I guess I just want to know what the enemy is up to, but it ends up making me so angry, I have fantasies about punching some of these morons in the face. Then I remember what a sin those thoughts are. Yet I keep going back to those sites. I can’t believe people say these things about our church. Here’s the latest I read: The Vatican has a telescope that they have named “Lucifer”. Of course it’s operated by, you know, those EVIL JESUITS! They are using “Lucifer” to scan the skies to plot all sorts of fiendish activities, like world domination and so on. Puke. There I go, returning to my vomit! Do any of you out there in cyberspace like to return to your vomit, too? :doh2:

Everybody is bad, everybody has his own fetiches and you have yours too.
This one, and I was a former Jesuit, is a bit painful for you.
For me, those sites are just too much stupidly funny.
Don’t worry, you will get fed up of them…

Why don’t you do something like pray a Rosary instead of wasting your time on stuff like that? Pray for your enemies and pray for your friends, and let God worry about “what the enemy is up to.”

Anything less is a lack of faith that God has the matter well in hand. Nothing escapes His sight. Just let it go, and concentrate on the things that God has put in your immediate life and concerns.

Good idea! :slight_smile:

You’re being a bit hard on yourself, aren’t you? I find these sites really fascinating, and they certainly give you an insight into the strange world of distrortions and make believe that is so much of protestantism. I don’t regard it as returning to my own vomit, since I was never part of such a culture ever before. More a case of trying to know & understand the enemy, and feeling really dumbfounded by their assertions (though, you do get used to them). I especially enjoy the conspiratory, one-world government stuff. Phew, them jesuits have really been busy, eh?

Of course, the bit about the vatican telescope is true, 'cos they have a huge, very advanced one (explain that, richard dawkins!) in Arizona, which ties in with area 51 and all them aliens… Jesuits, every one of 'em! :smiley:

Stop torturing yourself! It is an occasion of sin when such sites rile you up and make you angry.

Instead, try to realize that these people have been fed lies since they were little children, and it is a pity that they do not try to educate themselves to the truth. It is better to pray for them from a distance, and be as good an example of a follower of Christ as you can be.

Pray instead of reading at these sites, and you will be doing more good for the Church than you know!

If you are going to waste time on anti-Catholic websites, at least go to ones who who have serious arguments against the Church, and refute those. The telescope thing is just stupid.

That’s good advice. AOMin.org would be an excellent place to start.

Yes–in a non-theological way. I’ve developed a morbid fascination with the most repressive regimes in the world in recent times, particularly the state run by Islom Karimov. Just last night I decided to do a Google search for material on “Uzbekistan” from the British Guardian newspaper and then to catch up on the blog of former British ambassador Craig Murray–posted to Tashkent from 2002 to 2004.

These YouTube videos, from my archives and posted on CAF before, provide a good overview of this appalling regime’s penchant for cruelty: “Breaking the Silence - Uzbekistan”, “Uzbek terror and the UK/USA”, “Craig Murray on Karimov’s Dictatorship”, and “Craig Murray - Torture”.

Exposing myself to such information is absolutely not edifying, whether psychologically or spiritually. But there’s nothing this Canadian youth can do for the long-suffering people of this obscure country of twenty-seven million souls, apart from keeping the plight of Karimov’s victims and their families and friends in my thoughts and prayers. To pretend, for the sake of staying in my own sheltered bubble, that Uzbeks are not being so brutally oppressed would mean that Karimov was going to keep in line someone far from his clutches.

Trebor135: I feel the same morbid fascination with North Korea. God help those people. :bighanky:


It would certainly be interesting to see a Christian philosopher tackle the question, “Why does God allow vicious tyrants to stay in power for so long?”

Trebor135: I feel the same morbid fascination with North Korea. God help those people. :bighanky:

In Empress Theresa, all-powerful, 19 year old Theresa goes to North Korea and frees the people. :smiley:

Now that would be awesome if it happened in real life.

Is that a book you’re writing? When do you expect to have it ready for viewing by the general public?

Nah, I don’t return to my vomit. I like return to things that I can make fun of and deconstruct. :rotfl:

Is that a book you’re writing? When do you expect to have it ready for viewing by the general public?

I’ve written. Currently do the publisher search, a long process.

It’s touch to get a first novel published. The publishers wanted a published author. Seems that if you get something published it’s much easier to sell more books, which may explain why there are so many bad books in bookstores.

Either a writer uses all the good stuff he has in one book and that’s it,
he writes formula books like mysteries, romances, vampire stories, all of which are alike and can be written in infinite numbers.

I facepalm at those sites.

Ahh, that’s a difficult situation you’re in. Best of luck finding a publisher–keep us updated.

God bless,

Ahh, that’s a difficult situation you’re in. Best of luck finding a publisher–keep us updated.

God bless,

I wasted a year trying to sell the book as a sci/fi novel.

In March, AARP magazine had an article called “60 going on 16”. It was about adults reading young adult novels, for 12 to 19 YOs, because they have something to say to their hearts.
Soon after I read all three of Suzanne Collins’s “Hunger Games” books and realized that Empress Theresa screamed to be a yound adult novel. It’s perfect for the YA category.

I quickly rewrote it as a YA version, with Theresa’s age reduced from 22 to 18, and the story told from her first person voice. It’s much better, and I’m very excited about its prospects. :smiley:

Among changes I made was adding a chapter about her return to the U.S. after a year in England. She flies to JFK airport on a Boeing 747.
For reasons too complicated to explain, everybody is put to sleep except Theresa. She has to fly and land the plane, but she knows nothing about planes and the electronics are dead leaving her no communication with the ground.
She approaches New York. A small plane leads her to a two mile rectangle in the water cleared of all boats. They want her to do a water landing, but she refuses.
She heads for the airport but the runway is blocked by hundreds of vehicles. She flies over Queens and Manhattan at an altitude of only hundreds of feet, causing massive damage on the ground.
What can she do now? :shrug:

Although I, too, am guilty of curiosity when it comes to anti-Catholic stuff, I think the above from Lochias is pretty good advice.


When once I asked the Lord Jesus how He could tolerate so many sins and crimes and not punish them, the Lord answered me,

**I have eternity for punishing ** [these], and so I am prolonging the time of mercy for the sake of [sinners]. But woe to them if they do not recognize this time of My visitation. My daughter, secretary of My mercy, your duty is not only to write about and proclaim My mercy, but also to beg for this grace for them, so that they too may glorify My mercy.

(Divine Mercy in My Soul, 1160)

The only vomit I return to is if I engage in an argument with someone on CAF. I obsessively check if my foe replied to my latest point and am ready for blood. Horrible. I try to keep out of cyber arguments with strangers because they seriously upset me. :blush:

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