Why do I still feel guilt and shame?


First off i have not attended confession yet as i am not converted yet, i will begin rcia in the fall…

I have committed some very awful sins in my lifetime that i have asked the lord for forgiveness and i know i am forgiven but the weight of my sins or the burden i guess is still continuing to weigh on my heart…

ive been reading the diary of st faustina and it got me wondering if the weight on my heart about my sins is my “punishment” for committing them or a reminder to never commit them again…

will this burden possibly be lifted after i confess to a priest or could this be Gods intentions? If it is Gods intentions I will of course bear the cross and run to my saviour for comfort…

thank you in advance

ALSO…in the first confession of a convert…is it a long confession and must we confess every sin we have committed? even if we have confessed it to the Lord…also will all my sins be forgiven??


Have you previously been baptised?

When you make your first Confession confess what you remember of your sins even if you’ve already asked God’s forgiveness. The priest will help you through.

Yes, if you confess your past sins with the intention of avoiding sinning in those ways again, the sins are absolved and forgiven. In confessing all your old sins you will feel incredible freedom and peace.

You know that for something to be sinful you must knowingly and willingly consent to something which you know and believe is wrong, is a sin.


yes i was baptized in an Assembly of God church around the age of 9 I believe.


I had a reason for asking, for the previously unbaptised, sins are washed away by Baptism.

Your heart is full of good intentions, so you can be peaceful, and trust in God’s forgiveness. I don’t think God is punishing you by guilt, you are…but for us to realise the enormity of past sins, as you said, does help us in our resolution to avoid them in future.

You ask if your first Confession will be long. It will be as short or as long as it takes for you to confess what you need to to receive God’s peace. It’s a very personal thing,

Warm regards, Trishie.:grouphug:


I think the reason i feel such guilt is the sins involved other people and I think I feel guilty for “causing” them to sin as well, also that a few of the sins i committed were against my marriage…my husband knows of the generality of the sins but does not know specifics…and i dont WANT to tell them of them…am i hurting anyone else by not confessing my wrongs to them?? or am i just hurting myself? I know if I were to tell others of these sins I would be rejected definately…and i fear rejection…and i must say i fear being rejected at my first confession or being told to tell my husband everything…which im sure would end in divorce…im sorry for blabbering but my heart is in such grief with this guilt…how do i stop condemning myself? :confused:


You’re not obliged to confess to others where it will only cause more grief and harm. You won’t find that the priest will tell you to tell your husband everything. Would you wish to to told? Love others as you love yourself, Jesus said.

The sins are now in your past. You are resolved never to sin like this again. You will I’m sure now do you best always to be faithful and to be a good loving wife.

The others whom you involved, yes you helped them to sin, but it was also their choice. Confessing won’t help anyone. You do owe these people prayer for their healing and salvation though. Do that with love, not with guilt. You have been humble and brave in acknowledging these things to us, in trust that we will mirror God’s blessings and thoughts to you the best we can.

To confess to others’ now all is over is only to pull the scabs off old wounds. Ask God to continue the healing, and remember that kindness covers a multitude of sins.
“Cease to do evil. Learn to do good, search for justice, help the oppressed, be just to the orphan, and plead for the widow. Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow.” [Isaiah 1:17-18]


“If we say we have no sin in us, we are deceiving ourselves…but if we acknowledge our sins, then God who is faithful and just will forgive our sins and purify us from everything that is wrong.” [1John 1:8-10] “Jesus Christ…is the sacrifice that takes our sins away, and not only ours, but the whole world.” [1John 2:1-2]

Our God, You sent Your Son “into the world, not to condemn the world, but so that through Him the world might be saved. No one who believes in Him will be condemned.” [John 3:17-18]
You assure us through Isaiah, our God,
“I have dispelled your faults like a cloud
your sins like a mist
Come back to me, for I have redeemed you.” [Isaiah 44:22]

“Happy those whose crimes are forgiven, whose sins are blotted out; happy the man whom the Lord considers sinless.” [Psalm 31:1-2] For through Your Son, You have “cancelled every record of the debt that we had to pay; He has done away with it by nailing it to the cross.” [Colossians 2:14-15]

Therefore, our God it is not presumptuous to ask that we may be healed of our faults and freed from our sin. Indeed, You have said:
“No need to recall the past,
no need to think about what was before.
See I am doing a new deed,
even now, it comes to light; can you not see it?
Yes, I am making a road in the wilderness,
paths in the wild.” [Isaiah 43:18-19]

And He is :slight_smile:

Although we must strive through the Spirit to walk the way of Your Son, You assure us that we are not alone or dependent upon our efforts alone:
“For I, … your God,
I am holding you by the right hand;
I tell you, do not be afraid, I will help you.
Do not be afraid…poor worm…
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer.” [Isaiah 41:13-14]

Love, Trishie


Thank you soo much for your help…God was definately leading you to help me and I thank him greatly for a sister like you. I prayed the act of contrition to the Lord for my past sins and felt more at ease… i think my flesh is trying to condemn me and make me fall away from jesus…it continues to tell me i am not worthy of his graces…which im NOT but the Lord Jesus died for my sins and will grant me Grace because of his merciful heart…I have to continue to remind myself of this when i start to condemn myself…thank you so much again for your help…the Lord has truly blessed you sister…may he continue to bless you as you are a blessing to those around you :smiley:


A big hug…Trishie :slight_smile:

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