I’ve always wondered, as a convert not attuned to the modus vivendi of cradle catholicism, why it’s so common that Catholic women marry non-Catholic men. I even once heard Peter Kreeft make a joke about this when telling his conversion story. He said he went to see a priest about becoming Catholic, and the priest responded “It’s a girlfriend, isn’t it?”
I would have thought that religion would be something very important to a Catholic when choosing a spouse. Here’s why. When you enter into marriage you’re potentially taking part in the creation of souls destined for eternal bliss in heaven, but also threatened with eternal damnation in hell. Marrying a non-Catholic spouse I think we can all say objectively threatens any children born in this marriage and moves them away from God. Statistically speaking, if the father is not going to mass every Sunday, the children will not do so. As the Catholic church stands in the west, it is a rapidly dying joke among young people, and every marriage with a father not taking the children to mass pretty much ensures that these children will join the horde of lemmings running off the cliff. Finally, if you’re at all devout, I would imagine it would cause some distress to be “unequally yoked” (2 Cor 6:14).
So what reasons do these many Catholic women have for marrying non-Catholic spouses? Do the women think that they’ll change the men? Good luck with that. Do they think there’s not any Catholic men for them? I know that there’s not a lack of Catholic men out there, so I think the excuse of “I can’t find any Catholic men” is a little hollow.
The only reasons I can come up with are 1. pure attraction 2. lack of concern for their faith, preferring trying to find fulfillment in a spouse.
And that’s pretty much what it is right? Please correct me if you disagree. But in the face of all the down-sides I listed above to being unequally yoked, these Catholic women have their feelings, and maybe they throw in a blind hope that he’ll come around to the faith.
another poorly influenced and poorly catechized catholic raised by a mother who chose a non-catholic husband