Wife becoming Protestant, I'm staying Catholic


#1

My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That's fine with me.

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we're a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo


#2

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
That's fine with me.

[/quote]

it shouldn't be.

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo

[/quote]

Enlist your famiy, enlist your friends, enlist your priest. Her soul is in great peril as long as she persists in this direction. Do all with charity, love, and prayer. But, don't sit back and have a "that is OK with me attitude." It's not OK.


#3

I'm sorry to hear that your wife is switching, that is always a struggle. One of my friends left the church briefly. She eventually came back when the minister changed. Her husband continued to bring the children to Mass and sacramental instruction. They are all at Mass every week now.

Perhaps your wife will be back too.

Blessings,
Jennifer


#4

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home.

[/quote]

So... I guess that means no family photos/portraits either. Especially not any of anyone's mother/grandmother.

And what about Luke 1:48 -- "Henceforth all generations shall call me blessed"? It says "all generations" ... not "all generations but yours" :-)


#5

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

[/quote]

Praise God, she wants to read the bible only! Good for you that the bible is a Catholic books written, and discerned by Catholics. When it comes to defending the Catholic faith against non-denominational Christians, you have the upper hand my friend! Non-denominationals are all over the place when it comes to scripture and will often mar passages in order to fit it into their theology. This forum will be of much use to you when her questions are presented! A good audio debate between non-denominational evangelicals is linked below! saintjoe.com/prodinfo.asp?number=7327

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That's fine with me.

It might be a non-denominational thing about graven images. If so then why have an image of the cross or Jesus? If it is in reference to idolatry, then you may be able to search this forum on the topic on** intercession of the saints** or praying to saints

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we're a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

You are to be the spiritual guide in the family, so it might be beneficial to attend a Catholic bible study at your local Parish with your wife. If you and your wife were raised as Catholics, you know that many only go to Mass on Sunday. She may think that she was just a cultural catholic and didn't know much of the bible because the Catholic Church wasn't doing exhaustive teachings on each passage weekly. The center of Catholic Worship is Jesus truly present in the Eucharist, not the scriptures as many non-denominational evangelicals. The Word of God is not a book, but a person (Jesus Christ) It would be a great opportunity to bring her to a Catholic bible study, where the scriptures are expounded upon. It's always good to point out that the bible didn't just fall out of the sky, but the canon was delivered through the Church :thumbsup:

Look at it as an opportunity for growth for you, your wife and your children.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children? Thanks!
Pablo

I have not dealt with this personally. I am unmarried and my girlfriend is a non-denominational evangelical. She used to try to argue scripture with me, but since the bible is a Catholic book written, compiled, and discerned by Catholics, she has moved on to other attacks involving the liturgy that she doesn't understand.

The biggest witness against the Catholic Church that many have, especially the ex-catholic, are Catholics who sit in the pews that seem to live unchanged lives. If you go to a Catholic bible study with your wife, you will meet some radically transformed people, who live surrendered lives under Christ, and love scripture! God bless you, and yours, on your journey!


#6

Learn your faith well and show her the error of her ways. You need to do this because her soul is in jeopardy. Leaving the one true Church is worse then being brought up in ignorance of the truth in another denomination. She had the truth and is now rejecting it.


#7

Start by taking down all the family portraits. Yes it is a bit of an absurd argument but hey maybe she will begin to draw the conclusions.


#8

One can't force another to do anything, give her some space and see what happens, she'll probably come back on her own maybe. Sounds to me there must be more reasons than just wanting to read the Bible, as one can be Catholic and read the bible also, right. I am sorry, as I think parents should go to the same Church esp. if they have kids, maybe she can attend Mass with the family and still go to the bible study Church.


#9

Friend, it must be a difficut situation for you to have your spouse chose another faith tradition.

You have received some very good advice and some very BAD advice. You do not need to drive a deep wedge between your wife and yourself....show compassion and love...DO NOT RESORT to petty "examples" such as removing family pictures simply because she wishes to remove your religious pictures to seek to teach your wife a lesson.

You would do much to heal any breech by continuing to be a loving husband...."as Christ loves the church and gave himself for her."

I will hold you and your wife in the Light.....pray and continue to be a loving and faithful husband....."something" must have drawn her away from your faith tradition...perhaps if you find out the "why's and wherefore's" you may have a better idea to heal this wound.


#10

[quote="Publisher, post:9, topic:273637"]
Friend, it must be a difficut situation for you to have your spouse chose another faith tradition.

You have received some very good advice and some very BAD advice. You do not need to drive a deep wedge between your wife and yourself....show compassion and love...DO NOT RESORT to petty "examples" such as removing family pictures simply because she wishes to remove your religious pictures to seek to teach your wife a lesson.

You would do much to heal any breech by continuing to be a loving husband...."as Christ loves the church and gave himself for her."

I will hold you and your wife in the Light.....pray and continue to be a loving and faithful husband....."something" must have drawn her away from your faith tradition...perhaps if you find out the "why's and wherefore's" you may have a better idea to heal this wound.

[/quote]

:thumbsup:


#11

See if she'll talk to a priest. If not, use the Bible to demonstrate that you are the spiritual head of the family: 1 Corinthians 10.


#12

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That's fine with me.

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we're a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo

[/quote]

since my radical femenist card has already been revoked- actually I gave it back-I'm gonna go out on a limb here.;) : "Husband, cling to your wife."and be the head of your family. No, I'm not suggesting you grab her by the hair and drag her to Mass. Only you can determine what course of action to take. But don't sit by and let this happen without trying to do something.---Pray, Pray, pray for her. She obviously is looking for a place where she can participate in reading and learning the Bible. Provide that for her in your home or seek out a Catholic Bible study group; learn and share with her why the Mass is so important.These are only suggestions. But Man, don't sit idly by and let this happen without doing something at least daily prayer.
This may indeed besomething that she needs to do for her own journey. But it is more important than ever that the one person she trusts most stands firm in truth and continues to hold that truth up for her to see.-- Your children? They go to Mass with you.

I keep you and your family in my prayers.


#13

[quote="hudson, post:6, topic:273637"]
Learn your faith well and show her the error of her ways. You need to do this because her soul is in jeopardy. Leaving the one true Church is worse then being brought up in ignorance of the truth in another denomination. She had the truth and is now rejecting it.

[/quote]

I agree. Learn your faith and teach her about it. Rebuke her if she argues. Protestantism is quite unreasonable really.


#14

[quote="ChrisRedfield47, post:13, topic:273637"]
I agree. Learn your faith and teach her about it. Rebuke her if she argues. Protestantism is quite unreasonable really.

[/quote]

I don't feel rebuking a spouse is a good thing, don't let her read this thread, or she might never come back to the Church. God Bless, pray for her, be gentle and loving, and give her space. And leave the family photos up please, don't make things worst.


#15

[quote="ChrisRedfield47, post:13, topic:273637"]
Protestantism is quite unreasonable really.

[/quote]

Agreed. If Protestantism was reasonable, I'd be one.


#16

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That's fine with me.

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we're a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo

[/quote]

You might consider pointing out that Catholics read the Bible all the time, and that she doesn't have to go to a non-denominational church in order to read the Bible. You might also remind her that there are three readings from the Bible every Sunday Mass, which is more readings from the Bible than in many Protestant services.

You should make it clear that you will be taking the kids to Mass (even if she would like to take them to her services in addition) and that you would appreciate it if she came with you to show her support. You also should arrange transportation to CCD and complete all the eventual requirements for sacraments like Communion, Reconciliation, and Confirmation. You can't currently depend upon your wife to help you ensure that your children grow as Catholics.

Hopefully, your wife will return to the Catholic Church. May God bless you and your family.


#17

[quote="Khalid, post:15, topic:273637"]
Agreed. If Protestantism was reasonable, I'd be one.

[/quote]

:rolleyes:

Anyone can say the same thing about any religion.


#18

You should not force her to do anything. Of course, you can explain to her why you disagree and why you think she is wrong using the Bible and your Catechism. But to be fair you should let her explain why she wants to go that route and actually listen to her. Just rebuking her and demanding that she follows you where ever you go will just push her away from you.

As another poster said, show love and compassion for her.

I know someone who was getting interested in Protestantism and her husband threatened to divorce her. It was just a threat and he wasn't really going to do it but he was so scared of her leaving the Church. She was mortified and now she has trust issues with him. She is scared that whatever she tells him he will use petty threats just to get his way and now their marriage is actually on the verge of divorce.


#19

[quote="pabloSD, post:1, topic:273637"]
My wife has decided to go to a non-denominational Christian center. She says she wants to focus on reading the Bible only.

Yesterday, she took the image of Our Lady of Guadalupe off our bedroom's wall. She said that we won't have any more images other than Jesus and crosses in our home. That's fine with me.

But what worries me is our children. I know I have a duty to raise them Catholic, because we're a craddle Catholic family. The children are baptized, we were married in the Church. All of our family heritage and history is Catholic.

How have you dealt with a spouse who left the Church, and how are you raising your small children?
Thanks!
Pablo

[/quote]

My first question to her: Where does Jesus teach all one needs is read the Bible?

BTW: One cannot read their way to Heaven.


#20

Well the most important thing is to pray for her. When she is ready to talk about it with her and what it is she finds so wrong with the Catholic Church. As others have said I would encourage you and her to talk to a priest. Keep the kids a Catholic enviroment. Prayer in my opinion will be a big key to helping her though. Keep the lines of communication open. I will keep you and your family in prayers.


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