I am a 28 year old female , i havnt met a guy to marry. Am I meant to be single for rest of my life ? I am nervous when in social situation like bars , low self esteem and maybe fussy on men . I stop people from getting close to me . Any advice
My advice - don’t be defeatist. There’s plenty of time to meet someone.
If you get nervous in social situations, try taking up a hobby to socialise. It’ll give you something to talk about with others, and it’ll let you meet lots of people.
You may want to consider why you push others away when they get close. If you can figure out why, you’ll be able to work on it. If you’re really struggling, I would advise a counselor. They may also be able to help you with your low self esteem.
Above all, just don’t worry. Relax, enjoy yourself. And don’t settle because you think you’re too fussy or because you don’t want to be alone - take the time to find someone who complements you.
Work on your confidence.
Men of integrity are not attracted to women with low self esteem. Sometimes something simple can raise my self esteem, a new haircut or something as simple as a new lipstick or really doing my brows will help me feel confident. A new workout routine can really help.
If you want to meet a good, Catholic man, go where there are good, Catholic men. Does your Diocese have Theology on Tap? You might even try the National Catholic Singles conference!
You have most of a year to save up and make plans for 2019!
Work on increasing your confidence. Most men are attracted to confident women. Also, you’re not likely to meet a good man in bars or clubs. You should try some of the catholic dating sites out there. Meet a few people there.
When you say fussy do you mean you easily spot flaws with potential spouses or just that you are fussy in general. Both of those traits will not be good in a relationship. If you’re too picky you may end up passing by a perfectly good match for a silly reason. At the same time you don’t want to just choose anyone. There’s a balance.
To be honest I really think that if you actually put time and effort into finding a match it is likely to happen for you. It’s like anything in life, it’s unlikely to “just happen” without any effort on your part.
Definitely true. Sport is scientifically proven to make one feel good.
Work on being friends with guys, rather than finding “the one”.
There must be community groups you can join, and work on your shyness. A bar is not the place to overcome shy tendencies, and get to know people.
I met my husband when I was 36.
That is something you must discern through prayer. No one here can tell you that.
See a therapist to overcome your issues.
May you have better luck than I.
I’m single and 42. I can sympathize with your post. I would only second the advice from the previous posters. First, work on improving yourself. Second, discern through prayer. Third, see a therapist if you believe it to be necessary.
I know it’s tough but at the end of the day, you can either complain and feel sorry for yourself or get on with your life. You may not realize it at 28, but life is short and time is precious. It will work out. Trust me.
My mother was 39 when she got married. A few years earlier she was pretty sure she wouldn’t meet anyone.
33 here and barely engaged to be married this January. I was wondering if I would ever meet anyone at 28 too. Dating never came easy to me. But I kept trying and it looks like it will pay off.
There are many women older than you who are still single. Women with great careers, devout Catholic women, beautiful women who still have trouble meeting someone. I once corresponded with a woman who use to compete in beauty paegets who became a devout Catholic who was having trouble meeting guys. Your situation is not unusual.
All I can say is, actually try. Put yourself in places where good Catholic men go. Sign up for catholicmatch.com and let guys message you and reply back to the interesting ones. Don’t give up. Try.
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