[quote="Nightfly, post:1, topic:229304"]
I have been married 10 years. In the 1st year I had a brain tumor in the frontal lobe of my brain partially removed. After that I changed in that I asked myself why did I ever marry this woman I call my wife. With me thinking clearer without the tumor clouding my judgements I think I made a mistake. We have 2 kids but I do not feel in love with her. I am committed but do not, nor ever have since the initial surgey felt feeling of affection towards her. Sometimes it makes me sad that I missed out on life. I can't do anything, I am not leaving. What is a man like me supposed to do? I have no where to turn to a woman it seems. She loves me but I can't say I feel the same. I say I do but it is all to appease her.
How charitable of you to say such things about the mother of your children be hind her back. Your children will one day (if they don’t already) know how you felt about their mother. The woman you chose to bear them. Yes, the truth always is revealed.
Sometimes it makes me sad that I missed out on life.
You didn’t die, yet you say this. God sent this woman to you obviously to take care of you. I suppose she was living it up in the waiting room of the hospital, so she could go home and take care of an invalid. Then she bore you children. I am wondering who the fool is here? It will be only a matter of time before she acts on it, for truly you are not so foolish as to think she is unaware?
I pray that your children are more influenced by her charity, than by your lack of it. For if not, should your retirement be the length of one day, it will be long and lonely.
start loving her
that is, start doing purposeful acts of love, concern, care and devotion daily for her, without expecting thanks, acknowledgement or gratitude
when you go do work say a prayer telling God you are doing it for his greater honor and glory, and for love of her and your kids
when you play, ditto
when you cut the grass, ditto
say a morning offering and make a re-affirmation of your love for her and your children part of your daily prayer
pray for her morning and night
if she is amenable, pray together each night
love is an act of the will that translates to purposeful actions for the beloved, it is not an emotion, a chemical response in the brain, or a physical thrill
you are married, that is for life, there is no alternative so drop that line of thinking entirely and focus entirely on love
blessings for the gift of life you received with your surgery, now resolve to make that life everything God wants it to be for you. Love
read 1 Cor. 13 daily until you get the hang of it
I agree without reservation.
You owe it to God, to ask Him to send the grace necessary to love her as He would have you. FOR YOUR SAKE!