It is hard for me to understand. Seeing my son born was the most profound and amazing moment of my Earthly life. When I held my baby boy in my arms, it was truly the first time I felt unconditional love (in human form). No words could ever capture the joy I felt in my head watching him come in to this world.
Obviously, the situation isn’t ideal and I’ll spare you most of the clear cut reasons because you’re already aware of what is wrong here, but whether or not he was “trapped by her,” as you say, or whether or not he “wanted to be a father,” he is. God has given him a gift more precious than anything and he has a responsibility to accept it.
Psalm 127:3 says: “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward.” Regardless of what steps it took to get your BIL here, he is here and he is blessed.
I don’t pretend to know what is going through his head, but I suggest you talk to him directly, and not in a confrontational manner. Please ask him to talk to God. He needs to work out whatever he is going through, for the child’s sake.
Hopefully, with a little bit of encouragement and understanding, he will fully realize the blessing of having a child. It is the most rewarding of all life experiences. If he doesn’t want to be a part of that, it concerns me. There are only two kinds of people that concern me: *People that go out of their wway to tell you how intelligent they are * and People who don’t like the laugh of a child. This country is full of fathers who don’t want to be accountable, who are ignoring God’s command. Please talk to your BIL. Tell him how blessed he is. Tell him he has to leave his ex-wife’s home and become a man. He needs to be there for his child.
A child’s love is rewarding. When I am depressed about things in my life, all it takes is two minutes playing with my son and I realize how petty my grievances were. From the moment he was born, I was eternally changed. Those who haven’t experienced it, probably can’t understand it. But, I tell you, it was the greatest thing I have ever been a part of. And I would do anything for my son. I’d walk through a volcano in a gasoline suit to be with him.
So please, just talk to your BIL and try to make him understand how blessed he is. For his sake, for his girlfriends sake, but most importantly, for their childs sake.
They will be in my Prayers.
Yours in Christ,