Your prayer's are appreciated!


#1

Good day and sorry for the bother…I know there are more important needs out there but I could really use prayers right now…My fiance after a very long time with no job finally has a job… I thank GOD every day for this! BUT a lady from his job is complaining about him because at the end of the day when he’s leaving to go home from work he STINKS!!! He works a physical job, as a janitor supervisor position, and he’s a smoker!!! On his breaks he always goes outside and smokes… No one at all is complaining about him except for this lady…She’s a manager whom signs off on what he has done during the day and what he has supervised during the day. She comes in when he’s leaving just to check off his sheet. Maybe he’s around her 10-15 mins and during this time she has complained that he stinks that he’s leaving an odour behind him…

Now let me tell you something, when I exercise even for an hour, run, walk, clean up the house, horse around with my kids, break a sweat etc, I do not smell pretty, I stink no matter how much perfume I wear before and after! Now, imagine this man working 6 hours or so cleaning, sweating, walking, moving, picking up dirty smelling stuff, smoking, etc…How do you think this man is going to smell? AND HE’s a man, I don’t know any man that smells like flowers?

They told him that if she complains one more time that he’s getting FIRED!!! How does that happen? Yesterday he said he was standing right next to her, while she was signing him off and she didn’t make a face or say anything at all to him and just thought I should mention he’s a supervisor!!! She went and called his supervisor to complain about him when he was there and she could have spoken with him about it in private!!! How does that work? Is there anything he can do? :frowning: I am so sad and disappointed…I feel so terrible for him.

I know he doesn’t smell great when he’s sweated for 4-5 hours straight, I know that he doesn’t but he’s leaving for the day!!! Why should it matter if he stinks when he’s leaving? This morning he asked one of the women he supervises if he smelled, she said NO why are you asking me that? She was confused…He told her why and she said that woman was nuts!! I didn’t know you could get fired because after you are leaving work from a physical job you smell bad?

How can someone be this way? I am sure her husband doesn’t smell like roses when he comes home from his physical job and I am sure after she gets done using the bathroom she doesn’t either!!! I am so furious with this person, in what right mind does a man smell pretty after busting his *** working in a physical job???

We can’t afford to have him lose this job, we have a baby on the way and with all the sickness I am having from the pg I can’t over work myself, please pray that he keeps his job and this woman seizes to be on him like this such a negative thing on him!!! :frowning:

Any advise and prayers are very appreciated! GOD BLESS!!!


#2

Is she complaining about him smelling…sweaty? or about the cigarette smoke smell?

I’d think there isn’t much he can do about being sweaty AFTER a whole days work, unless he can use more deodorant or some stronger body wash in the morning? Dial has an antibacterial one that helps with body odor…

but the cigarette smoke smell(which is very strong and bothers me personally) he can eliminate by not smoking:p

but in any case it seems like this lady is being unreasonable ESPECIALLY considering he’s leaving for the day when she’s complaining!

Why does this lady have so much say in this matter? If no one else is complaining??


#3

Good question! I HAVE NO IDEA?! She didn’t tell his supervisor what he smelled like, she said “he’s leaving a nasty smell around!” His supervisor said to him, make sure you come in to work with clean clothes every day, wear extra foot powder and bring cologne with you! He was like “I don’t have money to bring cologne with me and waste it every day when I am at work and not going out?” He was like “I haven’t gotten paid yet remember you are holding onto a check so why don’t you pay me and I will get the extra cologne you want me to get since I stink?” I couldn’t believe it!

I told him not to smoke before she got there, that’s usually around the time he takes a smoke break…I personally can’t stand smoking either, don’t do it, lol, and when fiance comes close to kiss me it’s like GAG ME!! LOL I make him go home and brush teeth and clean up so his clothes don’t smell like an ash tray!!!

She’s not even his supervisor! His supervisor told him that if he doesn’t smell nice that he will be fired because it’s bad hygiene?! WHAT IN THE WORLD? She said it’s even posted on the boards at work that everyone needs to come in smelling good and not stinking to work…no one else is complaining about him and even if it’s from his feet this man is on his feet working you know?! How does someone smell someone’s feet all the way standing up? I don’t smell his feet unless he comes over and takes off his socks and shoes then it’s like OMG man put those dirty dogs away! LOL I know when I used to work in the bakery even at a young age when I would go home man I needed to take a shower right after I stank! LOL But it was understandable I was actively moving and sweating and everything else! He doesn’t stink in the mornings, even when he would give me a ride to work every day and take my kids to school for me, no one would ever complain about his smell, he doesn’t stink!!!

I will tell him about DIAL, I feel so sorry for him, I didn’t even know that was possible!

When my exhusband used to work in the chicken farm, OMG that man wreaked havoc I am not going to lie to you!!! It was disgusting and made me gag all the time…But I understood he was always moving around and in a place that smelled funky…My fiance today called me to tell me this and he told me he was on the floor trying to get some sticky candy and gum off the floor, imagine what other nasty smelling stuff he has to deal with? I am like are you serious and they are complaining about you??? Well only one person is complaining about him!!! That’s just ridiculous and unfair…

He said from now on he’s just leaving the papers she needs to sign and not even talking to her…I told him I am buying him a cologne he will take with him and overspray where that woman is around and when she complains about him smelling too good then someone better be putting her loud mouth in her place!

If they gotta complain about someone smelling they need to fire the girl that works in the photography department I took my kids for halloween and OMG not trying to be mean here, but seriously she smelled like she hadn’t changed her pad or tampon in several hours, I am not kidding you! Hey I am a woman and I know that when you don’t change often that stuff comes out at you like a thief in the night just bam hits you and this girl seriously smelled bad!!! Even my kids kept making faces while she was trying to take their pics and me being pg I couldn’t help but feel sick to my stomach! Believe me if my fiance stank that bad, there would be no way he would be near me ever!!! Esp now that I am pg my sense of smell is everything gross smelling makes me want to throw up!! :frowning:

I don’t know what to tell him or how to help him fight this!!! :frowning:


#4

btw yeah good luck with him quitting smoking! :frowning: LOL yeah my thoughts exactly! When she arrives he’s walking out the door just having her sign the papers he needs and that’s it…How in the world should it matter what he smells like when he’s leaving work?


#5

Staying clean keeps one from smelling. Perfume does NOT cover up body odor or cigarette smell, it just mixes in and smells worse.

First, body hair. Men should trim the underarm and groin hair to keep it very short. This allows sweat to evaporate and not cling and get smelly. It alsy permits anti-perspirant to reach the SKIN. Anti-persp will do nothing to help when it is just sitting on armpit hair.

There are very strong anti-perspirants available over the counter now, he should buy one and follow the directions in applying it.

Next is cotton undergarments. He can pack a change (or as many changes as it takes to get him through the day). Instead of going outside for a smoke, he goes to the mens room and changes his cotton T undershirt and if needed cotton underpants into a fresh pair. A splash of soap and water in the sink and he is fresh again.

Stoping somking is vital for health and odor control.


#6

Maybe this lady has a real issue with smokers and she is taking out on your fiance. Mayber it bugs her that he takes smoking breaks…so this is her passive aggressive way of making him pay for it?
If your fiance gets fired…I would tell him to go to a lawyer because it is a bit absurd to expect a janitor to be spring fresh at the end of a work day.


#7

Oh good ideas…def the trimming if needed and they have those prescription strength antiperspirants now too.

iluv I just was thinking…does he wear a uniform to work or his own clothing? If it’s uniform, is it getting washed nightly or does he have enough to wear a different one daily? Cause yeah, if he’s wearing the same uniform or overalls/work shirt daily and not washing, and during the day he’s sweating and smoking in it…it’s going to get reeeeeeaaaaly funky. Have him make sure he’s going freshly showered, in fresh clothes, and with the extra strength deodorant. And like kage said a quick wash up during the day in the mens room is a good idea. He MIGHT have to give up his smoke break too.


#8

Thanks for the advise but I don’t even do all that??? Even when I did have a physical job??? lol And another thing having extra clothes at work??? I mean seriously?? When he’s done all he wants to do is get out of there…after busting his butt all day the last thing he wants to do is go in there and “freshen up” when his ride is waiting for him outside and he’s ready to go home…at home he takes a shower and gets cleaned up…Then comes to see me once I get off work…

I don’t know any men that would “trim” themselves in any part of their bodies except for their face?! Let alone tell my fiance “hey honey trim all your hairs all over so you don’t stink after you sweat!!!”

Obviously smoking needs to stop but no matter what I can’t force him to stop…I have bought him the patch the chewing gum, cds for hypnotism, still hasn’t quit, it’s his choice to quit smoking and it’s one he’s obviously not ready for…

Unfortunately he’s not the only whom smokes in the company and he’s not smoking outside alone…Most of his coworkers are out there with him smoking it up…She just seriously seems to not want him there…at all…Because that’s just ridiculous! I work with over 300 people all in the same building, more than half smoke! And you think I am going to be complaining because the entire building smells like an ash tray? That’s their choice if they want to stink it up, I keep to myself and continue working… I don’t bother with the way people smell…

I will give him the suggestions…Hopefully he might be willing to give them a try…thanks again…


#9

I don’t understand either…Our janitors here at work never smell pretty…Even in the morning, these women are out here around 8 am cleaning and moving by the time they get to our restooms they smell like dirty toilet paper and wet papertowels…And it’s like 10 am…You think anyone is complaining about them and we work in a building of extreme important suits and all…lol… We understand they are working doing the jobs we don’t want to do…the dirty stuff!!! :frowning: I don’t get it…seriously I don’t!!! And he doesn’t stink during the day it’s at the end of the day, you know when he’s ready to go home and get some rest!


#10

Like I said I will give him the advise, I just never heard of men trimming??? Anyhow…will def look into those prescription strength stuff too, that’s definitely important!!!

He has to wear uniformed clothing, black pants long sleeve shirts etc…it’s 35 degrees here so yeah… his jacket does smell like cigs even after it’s washed…ugh… and he always wears a different clothes… I doubt he will go for skipping his cig break…no matter what I have tried to help him quit he’s still hooked…believe me I have tried…


#11

Those tips are basic good grooming. Every man I know keeps his body hair trimmed and wears clean undergarments, they take a small gym bag with a change when they are going to be needing it - from laborers to executives, in a hot climate an extra undershirt to freshen is very normal.


#12

That’s pretty cool…those men must have good dough to afford all that stuff!! LOL Ok thanks again, will definitely let him know…

Sorry I grew up with my father taking a shower once a day early in the morning and he’s always had a physical job, going on what 40 years now, until he got home he would shower again…I never heard of him trimming anywhere nor teaching that to my brothers…lol…Mother would always say that men have their own smells and we must accept it, and as long as they showered before and after work that’s all that mattered! And that’s how my brothers are, one shower in the morning and one after work…:shrug: And according to their wives, they don’t shave or trim arm pits! LOL And none of the men in our families taught that to their sons nor any close friends of mine, fiance’s father same thing, sorry we were brought up differently, embracing musky smells into our every day lives until the men reshower! But super glad people else are raised differently and are able to refresh during work hours before going home! That’s really good!!!


#13

iluv you know my male relatives don’t really need to freshen up, they’re not very hairy at all and the normal shower daily and deodorant is sufficient. For some men that si’nt the case, and they need to take more measures not to be offensive. I think what kage is suggesting is just that maybe he needs to do more than usual considering his line of work and considering that his job is at stake. Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures. It probably isn’t typical, but it might be necessary.

I have a feeling it’s the smoke smell that bothers the woman not body odor. As i’m sure you know smoke odor when it stays on clothes like the jacket he wears daily, just gets funkier and funkier and takes on that ammonia/urine/funk smell that is just…frankly horrific. The smoker doesn’t usually smell it either:shrug: :frowning: so they may not realize how bad it is. Maybe he has to wash his jacket, and leave it inside when he goes out to smoke, out on another jacket/sweater that is JUST smoke breaks. I know that means he has to buy another jacket probably, but I’m just thinking of ways he can cope with this and not get fired.

Can he talk to anyone in HR about this?


#14

There are some people who are physically allergic to certain smells (including cigarette smoke that remains on the clothes) and in some cases it will cause physical reactions.


#15

Maybe it comes down to what is worse - changing a Tshirt and trimming pits and smoking or having a job. I’d take the job.


#16

I understand what Kage is saying…I just have never heard of such problems before? Never?! So it’s a bit absurd to hear someone complaining about someone smelling?! Like I said everyone at work smells like freaking ash trays, no one says anything about it, I didn’t even know there was a law that stated if someone complains about you smelling you will be fired???..And he’s had other physical jobs before as well and there has never been a complain about him…EVER!!! Even his bfs whom he lived with before never complained about his smells or anything like that and these are bachelors!!! LOL

He isn’t hairy, doesn’t have excessive hair at all…so I mean it’s just the way he’s naturally smelling of a musky man when he sweats… :shrug: I mean if he had the money I am sure he’d be more than willing to buy another jacket, and take 2 but I can only imagine the smell of both jackets even after washing just going outside for 10 mins to smoke will be smelling bad… someone smelling like whatever after work is not an excuse to fire anyone… I don’t think that is fair… But like I said I will definitely pass on the message to him, I will go look for all these products that are strong for someone like him whom has a physical job…I will definitely try and help him as much as possible and even let him know to take an extra shirt and maybe even under wear I just know he has enough for the week I guess we have some shopping to do I hope he gets paid soon!!! Some sacrifices have to be made I guess…


#17

Maybe…but then why isn’t she complaining about everyone else? I have seen them smoking out before and it’s not just one person and my fiance and several coworkers work in that woman’s dept, sometimes at the same time, so the smell must be really strong then and concentrated with them all together yet the one she’s complaining about is the new guy?!


#18

And again you are right…but like I said the money isn’t there from either one of us at the moment so I will definitely telling him to trim…the smoking only GOD can convince this man to do that…:shrug:


#19

you know what, it probably isn’t fair, and I have no idea if it’s legal to fire someone for that reason. Maybe she is picking on him unfairly, it does seem a bit strange that it bothers her SO MUCH especially if she only sees him for 10-15 min.

That’s why I asked if there is HR he can talk to, or someone else of authority.


#20

Oh sorry I didn’t answer…I thought I did…man I keep like doing things like this where I think I do something but don’t? Weird… Anyhow, I have no idea! lol :frowning: I will ask him…I know that he seriously asked his coworker this morning if he stank and she responded to him he said with a weird reaction like if he was crazy or something…She was like “no why are you asking me that?!” lol And yeah it is kind of weird and like I said this past weekend I took the kids to the photography area in the same place where my fiance works, at sears, and the girl really smelled bad…Like I said but I held it, and I wasn’t the only one making a face of wow I gotta get out of here…

But I am definitely going to suggest for him to trim and as soon as some money comes available offer him the extra shirts and socks even underwear…That’s just weird first job I have ever heard them complain about him about anything and tell him he will get fired?! So weird…


DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.